Monday, February 15, 2010
Hey awesome blog-readers. I've decided to take some time from my awesome life to write into my awesome blog. As you probably already knew, I very nearly got fired last week. But then my employers realized how awesome I am and decided to promote me instead. But on a more important note, I finally did something that even some of the greatest players in history haven't been able to achieve...a perfect week. Yes gentlemen, I Barney Stinson finally achieved a perfect week. For my less awesome blog readers who do not know what a perfect week is... a perfect week is achieved when an awesome individual (in this case me) has one night stands with seven consecutive women in seven consecutive days. The term "Perfect week" was first coined by Alexander the Great after completing the incredible achievement himself thousands of years ago. Among other notable people who accomplished this include George Washington, and most recently Tiger Woods(..that guy's awesome). Accomplishing the feat wasn't very easy. Take a look at how the first day went:
Down at McClarens, it's about nine in the evening and this really cute blonde at the bar keeps looking back at me. So I walk up to her and I ask.."What are you drinking?"...She smiles and seductively leans towards me and whispers.."My apartment is about five minutes away from here". And five minutes later, we were at her apartment doing something which happens to be illegal in four states....am awesome.
Posted by John Doe at 6:11 AM